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For Love and Forever (A Collection of Short Stories)
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FOR LOVE AND FOREVER
Sloan Parker
Six gay love stories from Sloan Parker, award-winning author of M/M Romances.
Cops and Lovers: SWAT teammates Sawyer and Finn have been secretly sleeping together for two years. Sawyer couldn’t be happier with the arrangement. Until Finn gives him an ultimatum.
His Roommate’s Secret: Brady harbors a secret crush on his straight college roommate, but he doesn’t think he’ll ever get the chance to climb into Rex’s bed. Until Rex shares a revelation of his own.
Swept Away: Eddie just wants to spend a quiet night celebrating with his partner on their fifteenth anniversary. Only this year, Mike has a surprise in mind. A surprise that may be more than Eddie imagined possible.
The Break-In: Billy’s been breaking into his ex-lover’s apartment every Friday night for a little solo sex in the bed they used to share. One night he almost gets caught. Now he has only seconds to decide if he should stay or run from the most erotic encounter of his life.
A Lesson in Truth: After two years of longing, David can no longer deny what he feels for Michael, his professor and graduate school advisor.
Something to Believe In: Sean and Gavin meet on the streets and fall in love. Now they must search for a way to find a home and build a life together.
This collection contains explicit sexual content, graphic language, and one all-male menage relationship. 55,413 words.
Cops and Lovers
This story started off as a brief 500-word scenario titled “Partners” and was originally shared via the author’s website. It was later revised and expanded into the following novelette.
Sawyer Crenshaw drew in a long breath and leaned back on his elbows. His T-shirt lay crumpled in a ball beside him on the mattress and his jeans were open at the front. He didn’t bother to zip up his fly. In a few minutes he and Finn would get back to where they’d been headed.
Who the hell got half-naked, kissed like they’d been doing a minute ago, and then stopped before they got to the fucking? Something was seriously messed up between them. Had been for a while.
Finn stood across the room. He had his back to the wall, his arms folded across his bare chest. He sported a scowl that said everything Sawyer didn’t want to hear.
Or maybe he did. Maybe they needed to have this conversation. Get everything out in the open. Finally. Before the incredible tension that had been building between them for the past few months seeped into the job.
Not that either one of them would let that happen. They were damn good cops.
Both served on the department’s SWAT team. They’d been friends since the day Finn joined the unit, and as two of the team’s few single guys with no kids—and the only gay ones—they spent a lot of nights after work and weekends hanging out at Sawyer’s apartment or Finn’s house, spending their time off watching movies or lifting weights at the gym or working on one of Finn’s many home-improvement projects.
Then eventually they devoted a lot of that time to simply fucking each other.
Although they hadn’t slept together in far too long. Now they spent their downtime watching retro TV, shit like those old ’70s cops shows. They didn’t talk, didn’t laugh at the stupid-ass crooks or the retro hairstyles they usually mocked all through the show.
It was awkward and weird and completely fucked up.
From where he still lay on the bed, Sawyer threw Finn a smirk, knowing that alone would piss him off. “You’re mad at me.”
Finn kept his hard gaze locked on Sawyer’s chest. “I’m not mad.”
“Screw that, Masters. You’ve been mad at me since the raid on that house on Pickett. Like it was my fault.”
“You got shot. Twice.”
“I didn’t ask the guy to shoot me.”
Finn made eye contact for the first time since the kissing ended. “You might as well have. You went at him like you had no training at all.”
Sawyer sat up with a jolt. “Are you calling me a shitty cop?”
“No. I’m calling you a reckless one.”
“I know you don’t mean that.” Sawyer sighed in frustration. It hadn’t been his abilities—or lack thereof—that had gotten him injured. It was the asshole homeowner and his brother who’d fired on them as they were attempting to execute a search warrant. He got off the bed. Slowly, like he might spook Finn if he moved too fast, he went to stand in front of the younger man. “Just like I knew in that house you’d have my back. Like always.”
Finn met Sawyer’s gaze again and snorted out a laugh. He didn’t let up on the tense posture, though. “You always think you know everything.”
Sawyer let out his own terse laugh before he returned to the more serious expression. Maybe too serious, but somewhere deep inside, there was a part of him that ached to hear Finn say the words. Out loud for once. “Just admit it. You’re pissed about the shooting because it freaked you out like nothing else on the job ever has.” He jabbed a finger at Finn’s bare chest. “Because you’re in love with me.”
Finn’s lips parted. He sucked in a shallow, audible breath.
That was enough of a reaction for Sawyer. He reached for Finn and cupped his cheek, then drew him forward until they were back to the kissing, this time their mouths and tongues and bodies coming together slowly, tenderly, all of Finn pressing into him, focused on him with that usual intensity of his. Shit, Sawyer would never tire of kissing this man.
When they finally parted, Finn fell back against the wall. “God, you’re infuriating.” He smiled with a softness Sawyer had rarely seen from him in the past few months. “And you’re right. About everything. So don’t ever get your ass shot again.”
“Deal.” Sawyer gripped Finn by the waistband of his jeans and tugged until he was in his arms again. “So long as you promise me the same thing.”
“What?” Finn shrugged out of the embrace. “Not to get shot?”
“Yeah.” Sawyer hesitated, unsure if he could actually say the words. How big of a jackass did that make him? He’d known for a long time how he felt about Finn. He’d just never said it to anyone before. Not a lover. Not a friend. And definitely not the woman who’d given birth to him, then practically forgot he existed. He forced himself to meet Finn’s penetrating, hopeful stare. “Because you’re not the only one in love here.”
Finn’s eyes widened. He hastily checked the reaction and shook his head. “I never thought you’d admit that.”
“What? You think I’m a complete asshole?”
“No. Just the most stubborn one I’ve ever met.” They both laughed that time.
Something shifted in Finn then. His body went tight. He was suddenly on alert, like they were on the job and the commander had just called for lights-out in the tactical wagon, which meant they were twenty seconds out on a raid. Or maybe Finn had just made a startling realization. He pushed away from the wall and stormed past Sawyer, his movements stiff, agitated. When he got to the other side of the room, he came to an abrupt stop. “We have to end this.”
“What?” Sawyer’s chest tightened. He frowned at Finn’s back. Were they having the same conversation?
Finn turned to face him. “Not us.” He pointed to the bed. “Not this. The job.” He drew in an unsteady breath like this was the hardest thing for him to admit. “I can’t work with you any longer. One of us has to leave SWAT.”
Sawyer’s jaw dropped. He instinctively stormed forward two steps, then jerked to a stop, the bed now between them. “What the fuck? We’ve worked together for years.” Long before they’d started fucking each other. “And it’s not like us being together is a recent thing.”
/> “I know. But it’s different now. It’s been getting more and more complicated.” Finn studied the empty bed before him. “All I cared about in that house was getting to you, making sure you were okay.” He shifted on his feet as if he wanted to move farther away, only his back was already at the opposite wall. He closed his eyes instead. “It took everything I had just to stay focused for the thirty seconds the team needed to secure the scene. Thirty seconds where I didn’t give a fuck about my job.” He opened his eyes and smacked his own chest. “Me! I didn’t care if the assholes got away.”
“So.” Sawyer shrugged. “It was one damn moment. A lapse. It would suck to see anyone on the team take a hit like that. Those guys are like our brothers.”
“It’s different for us. And it’s not just going to be that one moment. Not any longer. It’s going to be every damn time we head out on a call-out, and you know it.”
Sawyer crossed his arms over his chest and held firm. Finn was talking crap. Neither one of them was about to let their personal feelings for each other affect the job or put anyone else at risk. They were both too driven and well-trained for that shit. There was no one Sawyer trusted to have his back more than Finn.
But one look at Finn, and he understood that the man he knew better than anyone wasn’t going to back down.
It was the job.
Or it was them.
“Fuck this.” Sawyer rounded the bed to Finn. He grabbed him by the back of the neck and yanked him forward until they were eye to eye, their foreheads almost touching. “Don’t do this. Neither one of us is walking away from SWAT.”
“We have to.” Finn shoved him back a step. “And you have to make a choice. You get me in your bed. Or you get me at work. It’s that simple.”
Simple? Sawyer spun away and ran a hand through his hair as he doubled back across the bedroom. “This is fucked up.”
He heard Finn approach behind him. There was a long pause like Finn was waiting for something more from him, but Sawyer couldn’t force himself to face him or say another word. Then quietly Finn added, “I know which one I want you to choose, but it has to be something we both want, something we decide together.” He waited once more, but when Sawyer said nothing in response, Finn spoke again. “You think it over and let me know.” He got moving, going past Sawyer and out into the hall, then out of the apartment, closing the door behind him.
Sawyer stared down at the balled-up T-shirt lying on his bed, a reminder of what they never got to that night, what they might never get to again if he made the choice to end things between them and keep working together instead.
Like that was any kind of choice. There was no way he could give up the job. It was who he was. Who they both were. But give up Finn?
“Fuck!” He grabbed the T-shirt off the bed and flung it at the open doorway where Finn had walked out.
Goddamn him.
* * * *
That night Sawyer lay alone in his bed, staring at the dark ceiling above. For once in his life, he’d taken a chance when it came to his heart. He’d let someone in, even admitted how he felt, and now…
“Fuck.” He rolled onto his hip and punched the pillow on the other side of the bed, the one Finn slept on when he stayed over.
Why the hell did the fucker have to say anything about leaving SWAT or give him such a screwed-up ultimatum? Finn was making his reaction to the shooting in that house on Pickett sound worse than it had been. He had to be. They’d always put the job first when they were on duty. Neither one of them would let anything get in the way of doing what they were both damn good at. Protect and serve. It was their life.
Sawyer grabbed the now balled-up pillow, dragged it to him, and buried his face in the fabric. It smelled of Finn’s cologne, crisp and clean.
With that scent, Sawyer was back to the night everything changed between them, the night he’d never forget.
He closed his eyes and let himself fall into the memory.
* * * *
Two years earlier…
Sawyer watched in silence as Finn threw his truck into park, cut the engine, and shoved the driver’s side door open with his shoulder. He was out like a shot. He slammed the door shut, then stormed up the sidewalk to the house.
Sawyer had never seen Finn that pissed off. It was kind of amusing. He let out a laugh in the empty cab of the truck. Better to get that out now. No way was he going to have that reaction in close proximity to Finn. He’d get his nuts squeezed off in response. Finn might just be the most easygoing guy on SWAT, but once he got pushed too far, he would never back down. Most likely that came from being a member of such a big family. Four brothers and two sisters, Finn stuck right in the middle of the pack. He’d probably had to fight his way through a lot of battles for his fair share of everything.
It just took a lot to get him to the point of no return.
Sawyer grabbed the bag of tacos they’d gotten at a drive-through on the way home and followed Finn inside. Ever since Finn had joined SWAT a few years earlier, they’d spent a lot of their downtime together, and eventually they started sharing rides to work and eating dinner together nearly every night.
Before Finn, Sawyer hadn’t had any friends outside of work. He didn’t connect with people easily. Hanging with Finn was effortless, no need to screw around with small talk or pretend to be anything but who they were. Even though Sawyer would give his life for any one of his brothers on SWAT, there was a lingering unease that came with hanging around straight guys. Like he just knew they were always, somewhere in the back of their minds, wondering what he did in bed with a guy, dying to know if he liked to suck dick, if he took it up the ass.
But with Finn, it was uncomplicated, normal. A real friendship. Which was probably why they’d never crossed that invisible line and jumped into bed together, no matter how tempting it would be to land a steady fuck buddy like that.
Sawyer closed the side door of Finn’s house behind him and stepped into the kitchen. Finn was pulling glasses and plates from a cupboard near the sink, moving with clear agitation. Sawyer set the bag of food down on the counter beside him. “You okay?”
“Sure. I’m great. Fantastic.” Finn ditched the plates onto the counter, practically slamming them down and breaking both in the process. He turned to glare at Sawyer. “How the hell do you think I feel?”
“Hey.” Sawyer held up his hands as he took a step back. “I’m not the enemy here.”
“Then keep your lame-ass questions to yourself.”
“Fine, but that guy was just trying to goad you. He was hoping you’d take a swing at him.”
“I know that. I’m not an idiot.”
The reporter who was writing a feature article about their SWAT unit had been trailing the team for the past two weeks and had taken it upon himself to target Finn with a level of hostility he was not directing at anyone else. Sawyer’s guess was that the guy was trying to provoke Finn into some sort of testosterone-induced rage that would make a great angle for his article. SWAT Cop Explodes on the Job. Anything to sell more papers.
Maybe it was because the reporter had once known a guy who looked like Finn, maybe a bully back in school or someone who’d gotten a job over him. Whatever the reason, it was fucked up. Finn didn’t deserve that kind of shit aimed at him. But…
Sawyer arched his brows. “All I gotta say is, it was a good thing he picked you to go after.”
Finn threw him another hard look. “What the fuck does that mean?”
Sawyer shrugged. “You didn’t lose it with him. Not sure any of the rest of us would’ve managed that after all the crap he said to you.”
“Well, I have no intention of getting written up. Or worse. All because of that asshole.” He went to the fridge and grabbed a two-liter bottle of soda, then turned to Sawyer again with a pointed stare. “Or any asshole.”
Wait. Was that directed at him? “What are you talking about?”
“You want to pretend the other night didn’t happen? Fine. Two can play at
that game.” He ditched the bottle on the counter and picked up the bag of tacos like he was going to dish them out onto the plates. Instead he chucked the bag back onto the counter. “I’m not hungry.” He stormed past Sawyer and headed out of the kitchen, anger radiating off him as he went.
What the hell? Sawyer trailed after him. By the time he reached Finn’s bedroom at the end of the hall, Finn was at his open closet door. He already had his shirt and jeans off and was standing there in nothing but a pair of black briefs that perfectly hugged his toned ass.
Holy fuck. Sawyer had seen him with his shirt off every day while they were roofing Finn’s house that summer, seen him dressing numerous times in the locker room at work and likewise at the gym, but this… Finn Masters nearly naked in the man’s own bedroom.
Desire raced through Sawyer with a sudden fierceness that left his mouth hanging open. He just stood there panting, gaping at those black briefs—and the man underneath—his blood rushing to his cock with a jolt.
Finn turned and stopped short when he spotted Sawyer. For a long moment, they held the stare, a spark of something new and unbridled passing between them. Then Finn’s gaze hardened. “Get the hell out of my house.”
That was it. Sawyer started for him. “What is wrong with you?”
All at once Finn had both arms up. He shoved at Sawyer’s chest. “I told you to fucking get out.”
Sawyer gripped Finn’s wrists before he could get in another shove. That must’ve sufficiently pissed Finn off. He twisted his arms free and sent a fist barreling for Sawyer’s face.
Sawyer ducked the hit and got Finn backed against the wall by the closet door in a flash. “What in the goddamn hell is wrong with you?”
“I’m sick of this shit.” Finn struggled against Sawyer’s hold.
“What? That reporter?”
Finn stopped. “No, shithead. You.”
“What are you talking about?”
With another burst of energy, Finn broke Sawyer’s hold and grasped him by the upper arms. He spun them around and shoved Sawyer to the wall. The drawers of the dresser beside them and the glass bottles of cologne sitting on top rattled in response. Finn didn’t hesitate. He got in Sawyer’s face, his lips almost touching Sawyer’s, their bodies nearly connecting at every point along their lengths. “I want you.” Anger still alive in his expression, he ground his groin against Sawyer’s, and Sawyer had to bite back the moan. Finn narrowed his eyes at him. “And I know you want me.”